desparate 20something

I don´t know what got to me a couple of days ago. Maybe for the first time my thoughts became a fucking mess, and I could not understand myself…..oh fuck fuck fuck fuck. Seems like I am totally loosing control of my head. BLAST!!!!
Maybe I should ffind a girlfriend…The last friend of mine who got into this kind of a mess, B., hadn^t had a sexual relationship in ages. In the final stages of his paranoia he ended up having an imaginary love relationship with his neighbour. When he finaly realized there was no real chance of even going out on a date with her, his world collapsed. He has disappeared and nobody has ever heard from him since.


Thing is, I am really worried that now, almost a year later, I feel like I am following his path to madness, and this really worries me. Damn, five years is too much time. Maybe I should go for the cherchaiz la femme business, just to get out of the dating-single h